My Old Kentucky Homesite

Archive for May, 2010

The Shroud of Tourin’

Posted by Larry Wallberg on 05/03/2010

In a silly attempt to deflect all the talk about sexual abuse of children by priestly employees of the Vatican, Pope Benny has decided to revive that old  Shroud of Turin nonsense.  Of course the city’s Archbishop, Cardinal Severino Poletto, is thrilled to go along with the papal plug. Just think of all those discouraged Roman Catholics worldwide, who are surely eager to have their faith reaffirmed by seeing — in person — an imprint of Our Lord himself.

You could almost hear the tourism coins going kachinginus vobiscum in Poletto’s head, as he intoned:

We can’t say with mathematical certainty that it is authentic; it’s up to scientists to do that. But it remains a great enigma.

Not to me. Although the imprint on that piece of cloth doesn’t look anything like Jesus, the face does seem familiar somehow. Whoever he is, I’m assuming that he’ll be able to feed the multitude.

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Posted in Freedom from Faith, Seriously Silly | 7 Comments »

You Wash, I’ll Dry

Posted by Larry Wallberg on 05/02/2010

I know that many of my readers are unduly concerned about the huge oil slick spreading along the Gulf Coast. You homosexual, baby-killing, godless commies don’t know that we have a MIRACLE SOLUTION available for any minor environmental incovenience caused by all that goo.

That’s right! If every American family washed just one lovable animal with dishwashing liquid, we wouldn’t have to worry our pretty little “drill, baby, drill” heads any more about the nasty effects of that essentially harmless ooze. What do you think about that, you crazy water-huggers?

Posted in Idiots, Playing Politics | 13 Comments »